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Students Required to Keep Digital Pets Alive for Credit
Jefferson High’s media center has launched a controversial new “Responsibility Through Technology” program where students must care for vintage Tamagotchis to earn library privileges. “Nothing teaches accountability like a screaming pixelated pet at 3AM,” said librarian Mrs. Fitzpatrick, demonstrating how to resuscitate a dying digital creature during study hall. The program came after administrators noticed students treating real library materials “like disposable TikTok trends.”
Participation requirements include:
- 30-day minimum loan period
- Weekly “pet health” check-ins
- Mandatory funeral services for expired units
Junior Marco Torres already failed twice when his Tamagotchi named “Sir Died-a-Lot” expired during a Netflix binge. “I didn’t know they could starve in four hours,” he muttered while digging a symbolic grave behind the gym. The program has seen surprising outcomes – overdue books dropped 75% as students focused on their digital dependents, though the nurse reports increased cases of “Tamagotchi-induced insomnia.”
The initiative turned dark when honor students started forming Tamagotchi fight clubs in the bathrooms. “We had to ban betting with lunch money after the Great Pixels War of November,” admitted Principal Vance. Meanwhile, the tech department quietly upgraded to a blockchain-based system where deceased pets become NFTs “so the trauma lasts forever.”
As finals approach, a black market has emerged for “pre-trained” Tamagotchis that survive on autopilot. “I paid Jason three energy drinks for one that lives until graduation,” whispered sophomore Leah Nguyen, though experts warn these hacked units sometimes develop sentience and demand college tuition. The school board calls the program a success, despite 12% of students now having recurring nightmares about low battery icons.
Originally posted 2025-05-24 00:00:00.
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